I am not studying Philosophy, it is studying me.

My thesis begins with the hope of no ending. In other words it follows Buddhist scholar, Stephen Batchelor’s encouragement “that we allow ourselves to be a mystery for ourselves rather than a set of more or less interesting facts.” (Batchelor & Batchelor, 2019, p.23) My intention is therefore antithetical in that I wish to fully…
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What do your desires disclose?

I sometimes forget that I am meant to be a “sex therapist”.   My journey of becoming one started in my early twenties, long before I had actually qualified.   I worked as a lay counsellor in a reproductive health clinic, often finding myself holding the hand of a young woman I had only just met as…
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Who the hell do you think you are?

What is it that psychotherapy is meant to be doing?  This is a question that I am, by necessity, obsessed with.  Michael Foucault thought that paying someone to tell you how to live your life was a completely absurd idea.  I agree, this should not be the aim of psychotherapy. When I was in training,…
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How did we get here?

#FoodFirst
It was some time ago now. Looking back, it feels like another life that someone else was living for me. But it wasn’t too long ago after all; almost yesterday in the greater insignificance of one lifetime. I was living out of a single room in the flatlet I was using as my practice. Trying…
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Why All Lives Matter

#FoodFirst
The other day I posted this image I had captured with the sentiment “all lives matter”.  Apparently, this is readable as a “rebuttal” to the recent social media meme #blacklivesmatter.  To be honest, I hadn’t even thought of it like that. I felt like my words, born out of a deeply cherished value system, had…
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Tata ma Chance

It has always concerned me how my children felt fearful at the presence of someone in police uniform.  I am not sure how that came about.  Perhaps the legacy of our country’s history made its way to them through overhearing adult dinner time conversations.  Sadly, they are more fearful now than ever.  When we see…
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Condemned to be Free

I didn’t walk this morning. Sometimes it’s a freedom to go inward rather than outward. I took the time to write. To double check the date on the side of my father’s box of ashes. It’s with great irony that a laughing Buddha sits on him now. It’s a beautiful box. I never planned to…
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True Progress is in Awareness

I haven’t been able to ignore how there is a seeming increase in numbers of birds announcing the wake of dawn. The natural world making itself known. It’s soothing on the one hand, but with a hint of prophecy. Their symphony says, “You’re not that relevant!” I try and let it be my meditation. I…
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Truth, Responsibility, and Freedom

It’s 4.30am. Somehow the waves seem louder at this time of almost-day. The voluminous crash washes over my half-made thoughts. It’s a welcome intrusion. I try and use it to rinse the anxiety already waking up inside me. I am waiting for 6am, looking forward to our newly habitual walk to freedom, somewhere between 6…
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